I am now entering the last stage of this journey…the third trimester! Rumor is…things just get harder from here on out. The last few weeks have been great. I’ve been able to stay up past 9:00 and have even had enough energy to exercise. Something tells me that this energy is going to be running out soon. I guess I’ll just have to enjoy it while it lasts.
Carey and I are now graduates of Childbirth and Breastfeeding class. While we did learn a lot, these classes were a little traumatic. Here are a few of the reasons why…
- Videos – On the first night of class, our instructor (who had 5 kids without epidurals), showed us a video of the birth process. There are just some things that should remain a mystery. I didn’t go to med school to become a doctor for a reason, and I was reminded of it that evening. The digital images were helpful to understand the process, but the 1980s, all-natural, nude birth clips were completely unnecessary.
- Pain Tolerance Test – On the second night of class, we had to test our pain tolerance with our new breathing skills (formerly known as Lamaze). Our instructor had us put our hands in buckets of ice to see if we could manage the pain. Now, let me tell you that I have to run my hands under warm water for at least a minute after cutting chicken that isn’t completely thawed. I am a big weenie when it comes to cold hands. So…this exercise was particularly painful to me. The goal was to last through 30 seconds of “contractions,” using your breathing techniques to focus on something other than the pain. Guess how long I lasted? 3 SECONDS! No joke. I’m hoping that having a baby is nothing like sticking your hand in a bucket of ice.
- Foam Boobies – Yes, I said foam boobies. During Breastfeeding class, the instructor passed around foam boobies for everyone to check out different kinds of nipples. This is probably not so strange when you’re in a room full of women, but add guys to the mix, and you have another story. As the boobies rounded the corner to our row, my anxiety level rose. You see, Carey likes to make me laugh. And he is usually successful. So, I was fearing one of those moments of laughter when you’re not supposed to be laughing. You know…like in church or a funeral. Awkward. I passed the boobies off to my husband and continued to pay attention to the lesson. I looked over a few minutes later to see that he had used the elastic bands on the back to attach them to his hands and he was studying them. I got very good at quietly jabbing him with my elbows over the course of our classes.